New York and I have a rocky relationship.
There are days when dirty streets, rat-infested, dark, smelly subway stations, constant noise, no room to walk on the sidewalks, having to spend long draining work hours chasing eleven three year olds and then feeling too tired to work on my REAL career, insanely high prices (I had to pay $3 for a bottle of water the other day...THREE DOLLARS!) and being unable to pay the bills, grumpy people, ridiculously good looking model people, high maintenance people, angry cab driver people, etc. etc. etc. make me want to hightail it back to those big empty fields I first left. Find peace again. Find silence. Find sky and stars.
And then there are those other days... those days filled with complete disbelief and elation that I am really finally here after all those years of wishing for it. Days when I realize that, my god it's tough to live here and not always what I expected, but those little moments that exceed expectation make it so, so worth it. Days filled with the sounds of saxophones on the city streets, just like in the movies. Nights walking downtown when I am suddenly met with those incredibly bright lights of Times Square that never cease to amaze. The daily discovery of something new, something unique, something I have never seen before. Tiny hole-in-the-wall restaurants with the greatest fettuccine alfredo of your life. Obscure bars and cafes featuring bands playing music you were meant to fall in love with. And so many people with so much talent: everywhere, inescapable, inspiring.
Tonight was one of those nights. a re-realization that I am here, and this is my life now, and these moments are incredible and fleeting.